Ep 6. An Imperfect Woman: Eleanor Was NOT a Good Friend | Self Worth, Girl Code & Self Sabotage
Carrie Washington’s Eleanor looks like the definition of a successful woman. She comes from an affluent family, runs her own company, maintains lifelong friendships, and seemingly has complete control over her life.
Then you look at her relationships.
In this episode of The Bar and the Brain, Tonee Earle and therapist Tay Fawumi begin their character by character review of An Imperfect Woman by asking what exactly is going on with Eleanor.
From her decades long feelings for Robert to sleeping with her deceased best friend’s husband just weeks after her death, Eleanor repeatedly makes decisions that seem completely disconnected from the confident woman we meet professionally.
Tay explores whether Eleanor’s behavior points toward low self worth, fear of abandonment, interpersonal relationship issues, or even self sabotage while also explaining why there is not enough information to responsibly give the character a diagnosis.
The conversation also gets into grief, girl code, friendship boundaries, Black women and relationship representation on television, Eleanor’s relationship with her friends’ children, and whether being everybody’s favorite “Auntie” allowed Eleanor to experience family without ever building one herself.
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 Introducing An Imperfect Woman
02:11 Is the show too much of a slow burn?
04:14 Eleanor’s character breakdown begins
07:52 Daddy issues or something deeper?
09:09 Eleanor’s history with Robert
10:46 Can grief explain what happened?
14:28 The murder investigation problem
16:09 Success does not equal self worth
17:05 Why Tay won’t diagnose Eleanor
18:31 Could this be self sabotage?
20:04 Black women and relationships on television
22:05 Eleanor should have chosen herself
24:01 Robert used Eleanor
25:00 Eleanor failed Nancy when she needed her
28:22 The ultimate girl code violation
29:54 Self love and fear of abandonment
30:26 Eleanor protects Mary’s son
33:06 The “cool aunt” dynamic
34:28 Is Eleanor borrowing her friends’ families?
36:07 Final thoughts on Eleanor
02:11 Is the show too much of a slow burn?
04:14 Eleanor’s character breakdown begins
07:52 Daddy issues or something deeper?
09:09 Eleanor’s history with Robert
10:46 Can grief explain what happened?
14:28 The murder investigation problem
16:09 Success does not equal self worth
17:05 Why Tay won’t diagnose Eleanor
18:31 Could this be self sabotage?
20:04 Black women and relationships on television
22:05 Eleanor should have chosen herself
24:01 Robert used Eleanor
25:00 Eleanor failed Nancy when she needed her
28:22 The ultimate girl code violation
29:54 Self love and fear of abandonment
30:26 Eleanor protects Mary’s son
33:06 The “cool aunt” dynamic
34:28 Is Eleanor borrowing her friends’ families?
36:07 Final thoughts on Eleanor
Creators and Guests
Host
Tayla Fawumi, LCPC-S
Tayla Fawumi, LCPC-S — The Brain Tayla Fawumi, LCPC-S, brings the “Brain” to Bar and the Brain, offering a mental health perspective on the relationships, behaviors, and complicated human dynamics we see on screen. With a therapist’s insight and a love for a good pop-culture debate, Tayla helps unpack the psychology behind the characters and stories we can’t stop talking about.
